I am in desperate need of some advice right now. I can't really go to my best friend or my sister with this right now because they're both really busy but I need some advice.

My boyfriend of over 2 and a half years recently wrote some sketchy e-mails to an ex girlfriend and when I found out about it and confronted him he said that they were just joking with each other.  Please Please Please read these e-mails and let me know what you think.  (I changed the names for them. they actually signed their own names but I figure I only want advice on what I should think....I don't want to be a bitch about it.)

E-mail 1

hey,
 
How are you doing today my dear? I hope i didn't get you into too much trouble. It was great seeing you again. It just felt like old times us laughing and smiling and just goofing off. I miss that. Not that i forgot or anything but I thought i may have gotten some defense up against those eyes and smile of yours. But i don't. lol. I am weak. Hey at least we behaved for once. lol. I don't think i would have had you take me to the train station. We would of pulled over at a rest stop on the way and just made out.  Until my train left then i would have had to call in. I'm being good i will keep this email rated pg-13. lol. Its unfair you got to feel my butt and i didn't get to feel yours. From what i saw it looks and moves perfectly. I loved everything about you. You are just so georgous. Anyways, i should get back to work. I will chat with you later.
 
take care,

boyfriend

E-mail 2

hey there
   I'm doing alright today. Just woke up it's around 10am, and it feels nice sleeping in!! Lol. I fell asleep so early last night - Nate went down to do the dishes and came back up and i was asleep. lol. oh well - i had 4 hours of sleep the previous night! No, you didn't get me into any trouble. I just don't want him to get jealous if he knows i'm texting you for hours. It's not like it's interrupting anything - every night is the same. he's on the computer in the room, and i'm watching tv. routin, yet boring. lol. anyway, i hope you don't think i'm like "hiding" you or anything. lol. and feel free to text me whenever, just can't have whole conversations. does that make any sense?? Idk... i'm just being silly. lol.
    It was definately GREAT to see you again. It felt so good to laugh and have fun doing nothing but walking around with a great guy. I haven't laughed so much in a while. lol...my stomach had butterflys pretty much the whole time. And, just so you know, it's nice to know your still weak for my eyes and smile. Makes a woman feel good. Lol. Just so you know, you said you changed "in the mid section" - just wanted to tell you i didn't even notice. You look like the same old Thomas to me! hehe....god, i really have missed having you in my life!! It's sooo weird. Like I said the other day. We only dated for like 3months, but somehow you're the one guy that I feel I let get away. Shortest relationship though. lol. I think it's because we were friends for so long before, we had more than just bf/gf, u know? I really considered you my best friend for a while, and i just think that makes such a difference. Does that make sense?? You're a one of a kind guy, Tom, and I am so happy to hopefully have you back in my life. It's prolly expensive but I hope you come home again sometime soon. You better make time for me! lol jk
          So, what else were you going to say in your email? If you DIDNT keep it PG-13! lol. So, we would've pulled over and made out, huh? Lol...my you think highly of yourself. lol... jk jk I just wish I had gotten to take you to the train so we would've had more time to talk. I wish that I had come over sooner. I feel like the time just flew by! I'm glad you were obviously watching the time b/c I wasn't! lol. I just wish we had more time to talk talk. About more things. I was nervous and dind't know what to say some of the time. Im glad you think my butt moves and looks perfect. maybe next time you'll get a chance to "bump" into it. lol. I love the fact that you think i'm Gorgeous. lol. It makes me feel good.
          Alright, i guess i'll let you go. I'll write more later or just wait for you to write back. Hope to hear from you soon!!

Missing you tons

Ex-gf 

E-mails 3 and 4, the subject line read  "hey, beautiful"

3

Hey,
 
how are you doing? I did get the chance to email you as promised. I love this new job so far. I am learning new things and everyone is great. I can't stop thinking of saturday when i got to see you. I miss you so much and just wished we had more time together. I know i wouldn't have been able to resist your eyes and that smile much longer though. Everytime i looked at you I just wanted to kiss you. In my mind i was picturing us going over the field behind us to a secluded area and just make out. maybe a little more with me making you feel so good that you can't help but smile. Although that kind of good usually comes with a price, your legs will be weak. I have to tell you those pants you were wearing really shape your ass perfectly. I watched you walk time to time and just couldn't help but want to grab it and let you know that i think your perfect. Your hair cut was awesome, i really did love it. It brought out so much of your facial features. I know i am not suppose to have these naughty thoughts but hey if i can have you at least i can dream about you. anyways, got to get going. I will talk with you later.
 
love,
boyfriend

4

hey there you
  
this is the other email i said i'd write in the AM. Hey how come Rita is mad at you? I hope it's not because of me. i'd feel really bad. I won't text you anymore unless you tell me when it's ok to.

yeah saturday was awesome. you make me feel so wanted with your email . i'm glad you like so much about me. lol. :-P  Yeah i totally wanted to go over to that field and do some making out too but we both know that def wouldn't have been a good idea. kissing always leads somewhere. In our case prolly somewhere it shouldn't. lol....
anyway in the other email i think i wrote something about thinking i may still love you or be in love with you. i'm not sure, but i just have this feeling in my stomache (good one lol) everytime i think about you, which as it turns out is most of my day. so idk, just thought i'd let you know.

alright i'm keeping this one short because the other one yesterday was so long - sorry. Nate was around so i had to keep it PG. lol. we need a codeword or somthing so if someone is around while we're texting and we don't wanna start trouble text the codeword and we stop talking. lol. alright well i'll talk to you later. i miss you love!!

love
ex-gf

I think that was the last of the e-mails (but for all I know they weren't the first...I think he just hadn't deleted these yet)

I don't know what to believe when I read these. I want very badly to believe my boyfriend when he says that that's just how they joke with each other but at the same time that seems like a weird way to joke. 

Please give some advice!!!

Wow, the last time I came on here was December. I guess I haven't had much to say, or maybe I just haven't had much that I want to share. Life's ok. Kinda boring though. I can't wait until December. Tom and I are going to move to Syracuse and I'll finally be out of this apartment. I like having an apartment with Tom but this area is too expensive and it's hard for us to catch up on bills when we keep having crap thrown our way. I always tell him that I feel like we can't catch a break. I don't know, maybe it's God's way of telling me to get off my ass and get a job....not that I really even consider God a part of my life but you get the idea. 

A few days ago Tom and I joined Gold's Gym for their free september membership. It's only been a couple of days but I like it so far and it's good for us to start working out more. (I need to lose weight so badly that I could donate to anorexics)  I'm also going to try and do yoga tonight...I don't know how that will work out but if nothing else I can at least laugh at myself. One thing I know I can update on is that Tom and I never went on that cruise. Tom lost his job at the credit union and that's when it started getting tough for us. Luckily we both found jobs but it just wasn't enough so he applied at the hotel he used to work at growing up and he ended up getting a management position.  The only thing that sucks are the hours cuz his shift is from 3 to 11 and sometimes it changes so it's kind of a pain. I feel like I don't get to hang out with him too much but then again he's only working there because he wants to be able to support us and I love that about him.  Ok well this was only supposed to be a quick update cuz I wanna go try that yoga.

peace out

P.S. I will never use the suggested tags after this...my suggested tags for this post are tom cruise sucks, tom cruise, fuck tom cruise.....not exactly the topic I was going for but mindsay obviously has a thing against tome cruise :-p

Today is day two of mine and Tom's diets.  We're going on a cruise to the Eastern Carribbean in April and both of us really want to lose weight before we go.  I especially would like to get rid of some of the weight that I've gained since we moved in but I don't know if I'll be able to.  It's not that I don't have the state of mind for it or the means, it's just that it's easier when you have someone to help you along the way. And even though Tom is technically going on a diet too it's not the same because he's at work all day, plus on top of that it'll probably be easier for him to lose the weight he wants just because he's a guy. So then I'm stuck with someone who's going to have it easy and he won't understand that it's harder for me.

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Ok so I wrote that top part about half an hour ago.  I figured that I could take a break and call my mom to wish her a happy birthday and when I called her we got to talking about filing taxes this coming year and it made me start wondering about some stuff. So I decided to talk to Tom online and tell him that I didn't know if I had to file and I didn't know if he could claim me.  I figured that while I was looking stuff up he could call my mom and wish her a happy birthday cuz I know she'd appreciate that.  Well after a little bit of looking through the website that I was on I decided to ask him if he called....and he didn't.  So that kind of upset me because I always make time for his family, and not saying that he doesn't put time towards my family but it wouldn't have been to hard to give a quick call and say happy birthday. I would have done it if he had asked me. So then I was a little frustrated and I was looking stuff up online and trying to get the answers to my questions and then making sure that I could give the right answer to Tom and then I couldn't find something through the site.  I decided to call the number that they give if you need help with something.  Well I told him that I was on hold and I was on hold for about 12 minutes when he comes back to the conversation we were having online and he tells me that he found out what I was trying to find.  And I know this is going to sound stupid but that kind of pissed me off because he knew that I was on hold and that I was trying to find things out and when he did that it was like it was pointless for me to be waiting on hold.  And then it made me more mad because I started thinking "well how does that work?  He can't call my mother to wish her a happy birthday but he can do something that I was already trying to do..."  Sometimes I get frustrated because it feels like he doesn't let me try to do things on my own.  And it's hard to get upset about it because it's not that he thinks I can't do it, it's just that he wants to be able to do everything for me because he cares about me. How can you get mad at someone who just wants to help you. But I can't sit around all day and let him do everything for me because then it's like my already boring life is made more boring because I don't have to do anything....I don't know if that makes any sense but that's how it feels.

Ok well it's almost one o'clock and I have a date with Days Of Our Lives....I'll have a post about soap operas later tonight.

peaceoutgirlscout,

Senorita Rita

Ohhhhhhhh man.

This is so funny.

Go back through your blog archive if you've had a mindsay for a while and read all the stupid things that you thought were so important at one point.....and if it doesn't work for you then read mine....I was so lame. hahahaha

peaceoutgirlscout,

Senorita Rita